I was watching an afternoon talk show I enjoy, and there is always a section where the host presents a “hot” topic for discussion. They encourage viewers to email, tweet, text, etc. their opinions and they will randomly read a few on the air.
The topic the other day was about one of the talk show hosts. She is the youngest of them all, and a viewer sent her what I’d call a “nasty-gram” about how she looked and the way she dressed. The viewer went on and on about her looks, her hair and her clothing, comparing them to the other hosts. Part of the message included how “nice” the other hosts looked and dressed and mentioned that this host was severely lacking in comparison. She admonished her (not too nicely, either) to “get with the program; fix your hair differently and wear better clothes.”
Really? Is that all that some people have do these days? Waste time to criticize people that 1) they don’t know, 2) they will probably never meet, and 3) what business is it of theirs, anyway?
I see plenty of people on TV who don’t look or dress well, but that’s none of my business. Who cares? And what kind of person wastes their time in trying to “re-educate” someone about how they look?
I’ve said this before, but many times technology is NOT our best friend. I believe that the technology we have today allows trollish types to post their nastiness online and never be caught at it. Seriously–if one of these people were face-to-face with the person they are disparaging, I doubt that they would say these things to their face.
I don’t always like the way some people dress, do their hair, wear makeup, etc., but who am I to criticize? For all I know, they could be looking at me, thinking, “wow–she looks awful!”
Unless someone comes up to me, looks me in the face and ASKS my opinion, I’m keeping my opinions to myself. We never know what is truly going on in a person’s head, heart or life. We may judge someone on how they look, not knowing that they might have just come from the hospital where a dear relative is dying. They might have suffered a miscarriage and be grieving that loss. They may have just lost their job and don’t know what they will do. Worst of all, they might have taken a lot of time to dress up and thought that they looked good. How hurtful it would be to hear a criticism then?
An old friend of mine once gave me some great advice: “To avoid saying the wrong thing, just do this simple exercise: keep your tongue pressed firmly against the roof of your mouth.”