What Matters Most

In the days where snow and high winds (and isn’t that just March all over?) makes everyone worry about losing power and wonder when the heck Spring will come—that’s when I think about what matters most.

In the “it could be worse” list, there are these:

  • We could have had one of our trusty old trees fall on our roof and crack it open like an egg during the recent strong winds—but it didn’t.
  • We could have been living in a house near the ocean when all the floods ruined so many homes—but we don’t live near the ocean.
  • Any one of our five cats could have gotten out of the house in a careless moment and got lost—but none of them did.
  • When the Crankee Yankee, despite having a flu shot, came down with the flu so badly that I feared for his life—he came through it just fine.
  • When our youngest granddaughter was born and had to spend weeks in the NICU with her mother and her older sister by her side—she survived AND thrived.
  • When I lost my mother in 2015, and my dad in 2017, I thought I would never get over it—but I did get though the pain. I will never forget, but the grief for the most part is over, leaving a sweetness of memories and laughter that comforts me daily.

There are more, but you get the picture. So many of the bad things we fear never do happen. We know that of course anything can happen at any time, but why worry in advance? (Note: this is a lesson I keep on learning).

These days the Crankee Yankee and I think of and voice these things:

  • We are so lucky to have found each other mid-life and that we now have a life together.
  • We have our family; the Crankee Yankee’s younger brother and his wife (who is also my best friend). We have the Crankee Yankee’s daughter and her family, we have dear friends here in the state, in Maine, Massachusetts, Alabama, and all the way to California. We have neighbors we care for, and of course we have all of our strays and “outdoorsies” to feed and shelter.
  • We have a roof over our heads, a warm and comfortable bed to sleep in, we have food and water and lights and warmth, and so much more. Oh yes, and a new computer that hopefully won’t crash anytime soon!
  • We have laughter and love and joy and gratitude.
  • We love “third grade-ish” jokes and silly videos.
  • We are well aware that we have more years behind us than ahead of us, and we cherish the time we have.

When you think about it, there is so much good that it can even overcome a devastating life event. When so many places in the world were nearly obliterated in the hurricanes and so many lost everything, there still was hope. I remember seeing on TV one woman cleaning up what was left of her home. She was asked how she and all her neighbors were doing. Her response? She smiled and said, “we have LIFE!”

YES! We have life!

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DCIS Surgery Update

Thank you to all who commented and sent me emails wishing me good luck and prayers for my DCIS surgery yesterday; it means more that I can say. This is the best thing about the connections made in the “bloggosphere;” we become our own *ohana and cheering squad.

Yesterday’s DCIS surgery went very well. Many thanks to:

  • the friends and relatives who emailed me with messages of love, hope and support; it meant the world to me.
  • My metaphysical teacher and my Reiki teacher who sent me plenty of healing Reiki.
  • the nurse who kindly and patiently went through all my paperwork with me.
  • the nurse who laughed her head off over a boob joke I told her.
  • the radiologist who carefully inserted the tiny wire in my breast as a marker for the surgeon; his kindness and care made all the difference.
  • the nurse who carefully took my vitals and hooked me up to the jungle of wires and such and made me comfortable.
  • the anesthesiologist who told me with a smile that he would be watching over me all during the surgery; it comforted me so much.
  • my ***surgeon who took the time to sit with the Crankee Yankee and me to kindly reassure us that everything was going to go well and that the outcome would be fine.
  • the nurses who wheeled me into the OR and made sure that I was comfortable.
  • the post-surgery nurses who took care of me, fed me, and reassured me.
  • my wonderful Crankee Yankee who waited all day for me, worried for me, and took care of me once we were home.

And then there are all of you who took the time to contact me to let me know that they prayed for me, sent me positive energy, and kept me in their thoughts. The knowledge of this was a warm and comforting blanket all around me. This is true and lasting kindness.

I believe that the words we hear both in our conscious and subconscious take root in our minds and hearts, making us believe that truly: ***”all shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of thing shall be well.”

Thank you so much.

*”Ohana is an idea in Hawaiian culture. The word ʻohana means family in the Hawaiian language, but in a much wider sense, to include not only one’s closer relatives, but also one’s cousins, in-laws, friends, race, and other neighbors.”

**I had asked my surgeon for a favor: when he finished the surgery and while I was still sedated, would he please whisper in my ear the following:

  1. “Everything went well; I got it all out.”
  2. “You are going to heal perfectly and be well.”

He did and I am grateful to the heart.

***From Wikipedia: “Julian of Norwich. Our Lord God shewed that a deed shall be done, and Himself shall do it, and I shall do nothing but sin, and my sin shall not hinder His Goodness working. … It behooved that there should be sin; but all shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of thing shall be well.”