“Be Yourself. Everyone Else is Already Taken” (Oscar Wilde)

(I posted this a few years back, but it’s worth posting again.)

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How I love that quote! Just imagine if there was no you in this world. Think of the family and friends and experiences you’d have missed, the jokes and songs unheard, the sights of nature unseen, the emotions not felt.

I’ll bet that most of us start out in life unsure of ourselves, unfairly compare ourselves to others, and imagine that we are not ‘as good as’ or ‘worthy of’ this, that or the other thing. Or we worry about our looks, our clothes, our speech, our habits and hobbies. Girls and women seem to take this to a higher proving ground, and feel bad if they don’t measure up to the current celebrity or musician, etc.

Before I forget, here’s a great observation from a well-known celebrity: when asked if the “normal woman” could look just like her, she laughed. She went on to say, “I am very lucky to have made it in this business; it’s not easy. For me to look the way I do requires makeup artists, people who pick out my outfits, jewelry and shoes, a dietitian, exercise coach, and more. The average person generally doesn’t have the resources that I have. Believe me, when I’m home I don’t look anything like this!”

Make the most of you—you are here for a reason and a purpose. Your looks, your style, your feelings, your passions, your interests; these make up who you are in this world. You are important, and you are here to be present for all that this life has to offer. Let’s just talk about looks, too, while we are on the subject. The Chinese in their wisdom have a wonderful quote about beauty: “Marrying a woman for her looks is like buying a house for its paint.”

This is not to say that you can’t “*foo-foo” up; make your own style. I can’t tell you how many women over the years have snarkily said to me, ‘oh, I don’t know how you manage to wear all that jewelry each day. I would be sooooo tired!’ Meaning: ‘why can’t you be less visible, less showy, less YOU?’

My response has always been to smile widely and say, “Duly noted!”

Looks, possessions and jobs are transitory things. The essential “you” is unique, precious, valuable and infinitely worthy. You are here for a reason and a purpose, and yes—your best bet is to be all the you you can be. Everyone one else is already taken, so just be you.

*Jane-speak for makeup, hair, accessories, etc.

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