More Car Talk’s “Staff”

Quite a few posts ago, I mentioned “Click and Clack,” (otherwise known as the Tappet Brothers) the two genius brothers behind NPR’s “Car Talk.” There were times when I would be on my way to work, listening to the call-ins to these guys advice to car owners.

Always at the end of their segment, they would give credit to many of their imaginary staff members. I always found this one of the funniest parts of their show. Here are some more. Remember, read them out loud to get the full effect. Please enjoy.

Collections Specialist Colin Duboise
Commencement Speaker Gladys Overwith
Communications Director George Stayontopothis
Compassion Coordinator Ophelia Paine
Complaint Line Operator Xavier Breath
Computer Hardware Specialist C. Colin Backslash
Computer Instructor C. Boynton Glick
Conflict Resolution Specialist Hugo Origo
Conspiracy Theorist Nadia Belimi
Construction Manager Dustin Dubree
Coordinator, 12-Step Recovery Program Cody Pendant
Corporate Spokesperson Hugh Lyon Sack
Crash Tester Hope Anna Prayer
Creative Director Drew A. Blank
Credit Counselor Max Stout
Criminal Justice Expert Lauren Order
Customer Car Care Representative Haywood Jabuzoff
Customer Car Care Representative Assistant Dot Stubadd
Customer Credit Officer Noah Wayne Hellman
Defense Attorney II Heronimus B. Blind
Defense Attorney III  Donnatella Dicoppas
Dermatologist for Teenagers Don Pickett
Desi Arnaz Biographer Ike Arumba
Dessert Chef Tyra Meesu
Dessert Menu Planner Eaton Flanagan
Director of Accounts Payable Bill Shredder
Director of Alpine Choir O. Leo Lahey
Director, Automotive Recycling Center
(aka Junkyard)
Ricardo Dismantleban
 Director of Catering  Russell Upsumgrub
Director of Deep Sea Research Marianna Trench
Director of Delicate Electronics Repair Anita Hammer
Director of Desert Food Supplies Sandy Berger
Director of Employee Loyalty Program Upton Leftus
Director of Intensive Care Unit
(The Picabo ICU)
Picabo Street
Director of Japanese Cooling Systems Emperor Overhito
 Director of Photography Len Scapon
Director of Positive Reinforcement A. Kurt Nod
Director of Pollution Control Maury Missions
Director of Three Stooges Studies Lee Eyeapoka
Director of Vengeance Ewell Rudy Day
 Dope Slap Administrator Thad Hertz
Drug Trials Specialist Placebo Domingo
Drycleaner Preston Creases

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