I Fought the Spider and…I WON!”

I hate, loath and despise spiders—and they seem to know it because I’m always the one to find them. Oh, I know that they help to keep the bug population down, which I appreciate. I also admire their exquisite webs, some of which are quite creative. Also, I do love the book, “Charlotte’s Web,” and cried at the end of it.

BUT—your general, everyday, run-of-the-mill spider just gives me the creeps. I was horrified to see pictures on the Internet of giant spiders in Australia large enough to cover an entire window……yeeeesh. I myself would move out of there tout de suite. While I watched the movie “Lord of the Rings” and the Harry Potter movie with the giant spiders in the forest, well….that was altogether too real and way too creepy for me.

Somewhere I heard (and hopefully this isn’t real) that there is a species of flying spiders. Or spiders that can sort of hang-glide their way down from trees. Great—like the regular non-flying ones aren’t bad enough.

But at least there are no giant arachnids any where near here…I devoutly hope. But there was one in the shower the other morning. It wasn’t a little one, either. It was as large as a quarter (legs and all). As I wasn’t quite done with my shower at the time, I bravely did not jump out of the tub; I fought back.

I used the shower head to manipulate it to the drain, hoping that it would be pushed down into it. But no—it clung to the drain with all eight legs. So I grabbed the conditioner and covered him in it. That got him down the drain! I watched for him, but he didn’t emerge, so I got out of the tub and toweled off.

But since I don’t trust spiders, I poured some bleach down the drain as a chaser to the conditioner. Cruel maybe, but it got him out of my tub.

At least he died with soft hair and some nice blonde highlights.

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