“Well, You’re Jest As Hard to Get as That First Pickle Outta the Jar!”

Has anyone else gotten that homey little intro from a jolly-sounding gal on the phone? I fell for it once and let myself get suckered into sending $10 for her cause just to get rid of her.

First of all, it ticked me off because she comes on to you as though she is a close friend–you hear her voice and wonder who the heck it is because she sounds nice; almost like someone you know, but can’t place at the moment. Then you respond, and bang–she’s got you.

Those of you who know me personally will attest that usually I’d rather walk on my own lips rather than say something awful about someone, but boy–this woman really got up my nose. I realize that she and many, many others make their living cold-calling people (or even, bless them, volunteer their time). But when they pull that old time-y ‘gosh all hemlocks, it’s been a dog’s age since I talked with you’ folksy crap, it makes me NEVER want to send a cent to ANY organization.

There is a way to block these types of calls by putting yourself on a “Don’t Call” list, but it seems that that list has a short memory, because I keep doing it and I keep on getting the calls. As I said in a previous post, such calls, plus political surveys, robo-calls, telemarketers and solicitors for money; all get a couple of good blasts from our *Minion Button. This button may be the deterrent we’ve always wanted. In fact, this button just may be the secret to world peace.

It’s things like this that are slowly but surely turning the Crankee Yankee and I into the crabby old cranks we’ve always aspired to be; that and the ever-increasing certainty that we just don’t give a hoot about a lot of things any longer. In fact, I recently found the following to not only be hilarious, but quite close to home:

  • “Do not fear to be eccentric in opinion, for every opinion now accepted was once eccentric.” – Bertrand Russell
  • “If you’re poor and you do something stupid, you’re nuts.  If you’re rich and do something stupid, you’re eccentric.” – Bobby Heenan
  • “Money, like vodka, turns a person into an eccentric.” – Anton Chekhov
  • “A civilized society is one which tolerates eccentricity to the point of doubtful sanity.” – Robert Frost
  • “The English like eccentrics. They just don’t like them living next door.” – Julian Clary

*The Crankee Yankee brought this home to me one day, since we both love the Minions (first seen in the movies “Despicable Me” and Despicable Me 2″). It’s a large-ish button that has dozens of funny phrases all said in “Minionese.” Very funny.

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