Are The Wantsies as Good as the Havesies?

Did you ever see something that you absolutely fell in love with and that you wanted just because you wanted it? I am talking about impractical, wonderful, amazing, one-of-a-kind things that just enchant you. You look at them and that little “I want” buzzer goes off right behind your eyes and your knees get weak, and you breathe ‘ohhhhhh, I want that!’

Now we all know that kids regularly fall in love with stuff that they think they want because it’s right there in front of them in the toy store. As soon as they go up another aisle, they fall for something else and forget all about that first thing. I’m not talking about that kind of “wantsie”–I am speaking of the kind of thing you fall for so hard and so fast that you want to marry it.

For instance, my weakness is jewelry. When something strikes me as a real “me” piece, I want it. However, I’m not a complete idiot; I can easily fall right out of love with something if it costs more than I’m willing to pay. I don’t buy diamonds, or platinum or gold; silver is my choice. But that aside, when the wantsies grab me, my legs get weak and my mind grows dim.

So–once you have the wantsie and it becomes the havesie, is it worth it? For me, I’d say about 50/50. I used to be hooked on one of those very popular TV buy-anything-you-want shows. Just the hype alone would propel me into an attack of the wantsies. Once I called my order in, I would be in an absolute fever to get the item in the mail. When it finally arrived, I would slowly open it to reveal the thing I felt I couldn’t live without. Sometimes it was a real WOW, other times, not so much.

You know how it goes: it’s late at night, you’re alone in the house, you are feeling a bit sorry for yourself, you had one more glass of wine than usual, you called in and hey! You ended up on the air, talking with a host who was only too happy to sell you the wantsie you wanted. When it finally shows up, you may think, “what the hell did I order this for?” That situation is called the “one wine too many wantsie.”

As the years go by I have learned to wait myself out. I look at what I want, think about it, look through all my stuff to be sure I don’t already have something pretty much like it–think some more and then sleep on it. Maybe for a week. I try to review why I wanted it in the first place, asking myself such questions as “Are you feeling neglected and want to make yourself feel better?” “Do you feel you deserve something nice for all the hard work you do?” which leads naturally into this: “Dammit, no one appreciates all I do! I’m going to buy myself something!” Or “do you want it just because you want it?”

So, the afore-mentioned wantsie, after passing successfully through the above routine, now can move forward to the actual purchase. When I can look at it on my finger, my wrist or on my ears and say, “Now that’s what I wanted (insert a chorus here of ‘I’ll tell ya what I want/What I really really want” here).” And then I am happy and content…until another wantsie comes along.

And oh, how those wantsies want to be wanted!



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