Oh, the number of times I’ve cast my eyes to the heavens saying, “why ME??” When bad things happened to me, I took it so personally; as if no one else in the world had troubles or worries. (Ha–that was in my 20s, and I only wish my troubles now were as easy as those then!) I grumped and moaned and swore and kicked pillows and stomped around with a black cloud over my head, having a lovely case of Poor Me. What an awful waste of time!
With the luxury of all those years ahead of me, I felt perfectly justified to weep and wail. Did I ever consider that other people had problems, too? Probably not. And I was raised well, too–I was told often that I wasn’t the center of the world and that it would be well for me to remember that I wasn’t the only person in the world. But we never really learn until we get older…
I was talking to a dear friend who had just found out she needed surgery. Bad enough, but she also suffers from some chronic conditions as well, so this is just the poisonous icing on a s***cake. This kind of thing puts everything in proper perspective; how the little things cease to matter in the face of such awful news. The sad fact is that most of us will probably catch the bullet at one time or other. Some of us have been very lucky to have dodged broken bones, a serious car accident, fires, floods, etc. This does not mean that we will never have something bad happen. But conversely, we may also live lives of pleasant enterprise and never face any serious difficulties.
So how do we go on, knowing that bad things may happen? Here’s how: we take the next breath, the next step, the next challenge. We take the usual precautions; don’t leave a candle burning in the house before you leave, don’t leave the doors unlocked, be sure you have a roadside emergency kit for your vehicle, don’t text and drive, and so on. While we can’t live in perpetual fear, we can’t live in blissful ignorance either. We need to strike a balance between fear and preparation, and live our lives the best way we can. The old saying, “prepare for the worst but pray for the best” is a good reminder.
Here’s an effective device I’ve used for years now that you are welcome to try–*positive affirmations. Don’t laugh; they work! What is a positive affirmation? It is a simple phrase uttered out loud at least 15 times. How does it work? Take something that is currently worrying you–for example, say a loved one is in the hospital. You of course want that person to be healthy and well and to be back home soon, correct? You can say something like this: “<insert name here> is completely healthy and well and is home.” Say this phrase with utter conviction at least 15 times out loud. Why out loud? Because positive (and negative) energy has a physical effect. Without getting into what I or you or anyone else believes, positive energy causes positive results. Does it work every time? No, of course not. Positive energy and affirmations don’t mean that automatic healing happens in the case of the loved one in the hospital, but it does cause positive energy rather than negative energy.
Here are a few affirmations I use daily, along with the results:
Positive Affirmation (PA): “Everything today is going to go GREAT!” Positive Result (PR): Things do go well and smoothly.
PA: “All the bills are paid in full.” PR: All bills DO get paid in full, often in ways you could never have foreseen.
PA: “I always get a great parking space.” PR: Nine times out of ten, you DO find a great parking space.
This one worked for me BIG TIME:
PA: “I have the perfect job, in the perfect location and with the perfect salary.” PR: I actually got the perfect job, in the perfect location and with the perfect salary.
Look, this isn’t a magic carpet ride to everything going our way always. Stuff happens. But what can really ease the way is to keep as positive an outlook as possible, and do try one or two of the positive affirmations. The “perfect parking space” is a great first exercise, so try it out. When you say it aloud, say it with conviction and absolute belief that you will get that perfect parking spot. When you get that space, DO say “Thanks!” Do NOT say “wow, this kind of thing NEVER happens to me!” That will insure that it won’t happen again. Keep your affirmation simple; don’t add too many details. All you need to do is to put that positive intention out there. The universe will handle the details.
So, back to the original question: why me? Well, why NOT me? As we are all part of the human race, we can expect both good and bad times. In order to roll with it all, stay positive, stay alert and focus on all that is good. Two of the greatest gifts we humans are given is free will and a working brain. How we use them is up to us, so let’s make it positive.
*I first learned to use positive affirmations from taking courses from the wonderful Noreen McDonald, who teaches several metaphysical courses in Wolfeboro, NH. Check out her web site at http://www.noreenmcdonald.com.